We learn the following when the Lord made this statement regarding forgiveness:
D&C 64: 10 “I the Lord will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you, it is required to forgive all men.”
But the act of forgiving or receiving forgiveness, is not easy. It is complex and requires many preliminary steps. Recognition, remorse, revealing and reconciliation all come before there can be rejoicing.
When one seeks forgiveness from his fellowman, he is placed in the humble position of a beggar petitioning for something that is beyond his power to acquire for himself. He is totally dependent upon someone else to show mercy before the act can be consummated.
In this respect, forgiveness is a contract between two parties: the transgressor and the transgressed. Failure to reach a mutual agreement on the conditions of the contract means both parties lose. The transgressor remains in debt or bondage, while the transgressed remains unrequited or unreconciled, perhaps even drowning in bitter resentment and soul destroying hurt. Both are chained to each other and cannot move away from the original sin.
Yet the moment forgiveness is fully granted and joyfully received, both are immediately set free. The transgressor is relieved of the burden of his debts and transgression. The transgressed has also removed his own unbearable burden by the very act of forgiving and forgetting. Both come away with an immense feeling of relief and freedom because they are unyoked. They can now move on with life.
It is easier to understand why God would command us to “ forgive all men” if we accept that we, unlike God, are not perfect. The process of becoming perfect requires adopting and mastering the qualities which make him “God” in the first place. Mercy, love, compassion, understanding and humility are required to forgive others who trespass against us while living life. They are also the qualities we must perfect to become as God is. The bigger the debt or offense, the greater the need we personally have for these God like qualities. As we embrace the act of granting mercy, love, compassion and understanding unto to the least of those who seek our forgiveness, we become more worthy to be the recipients of mercy, love compassion and understanding from God – the very being to whom we all stand in debt. The more often we go through the process of forgiveness, the more we progress and qualify to be reconciled with God. Someday, whether we are the transgressor or the transgressed, we will stand in his presence, petitioning for his forgiveness.
D&C 64: 9 “Wherefore I say unto you that ye ought to forgive one another, for he who foregiveth not his brother his trespasses, standeth condemned before the Lord, for there remaineth in him the greater sin.”
D&C 64: 11 “ And ye ought to say in your hearts – Let God judge between me and thee and reward thee according to thy deeds”
– Doug Garrett